My play...

I have started writing since young. I wrote in a diaries. Little did I know, I have in fact collected a few books of my histories in my drawer. From then, I started blogging. My previous blog has been suspended for dunno what reasons... and that I am writing here. Most parts of my histories recorded down this "Prince" of my heart, from young till now.

Life has been changing a lot these few years. There were ups, there were downs. But, no matter ups or downs, he is still there, by my side giving me supports and encouragements. Sometimes, when I looked back, its just like an interesting play. A play that I've written for myself, a play that I've been through.

Sometimes, I feel myself lucky for what I have and I had. But sometimes, I still blame for what I feel or I think is imperfect in my play. He always says I am demanding and I have a very high expectation. Towards my life, and towards him.

"Am I really so?" I asked myself.

I do not know whether am I really holding too tight. Is this because of I am feeling insecure, low self-esteem, or I have no confidence in him? I cant answer to myself. I have no answer...

I knew he has been a good Prince of mine. He did the very best of himself to make me happy, to make me joy. He like to see me chuckles, he like to see me cheer. But my chuckles become lesser when we are closer, nowadays. I do not deny that I feel blissful too, but do not know why I do feel disappointed sometimes.

This life... is my own play. There is always a conflict between two extremes.
Whether too live it joyfully or not, that's my rule...