My frozen embryos

Last Saturday was the Day 3 after my eggs collection day. We were supposed to be informed or to get a call from the Embryologist from KL Fertility at about 2-4pm on how many embryos that are successful to be fertilized and frozen. 

The entire morning I was worried and I was so afraid to hear my phone rings. Hubby sensed something wrong with me and kept on asking was I alright. I just pretended that I am okay and kept quiet. I knew he saw me moody but I couldn't help that I was really afraid that none of the eggs were being fertilized. 

After our brunch, sitting at the dining table, hubby asked if we wanted to give a call to KLF. It was only about 12+pm. I told him that they will be calling around 2-4pm to inform. But then, in another way, I pushed my phone over to hubby and asked him to call. He knew I was afraid to make that call. In fact, I can sensed that he was anxious about it too. 

So, he called. The call was transferred to the Embryologist Dept and one of the embryologist answered the call. My name and IC number was given and she came back to us with the result. 

Total collected: 7 eggs

Total matured: 3 eggs

Total fertilized: 3

Total frozen: 2 embryos in Day 3

Total only 2 embryos are frozen. It made me relieved and also a lil' depressed. I am relieved that at least there are some lil embies to be able to transfer this cycle. 2 lil embies are suffice this cycle. I am a lil depressed as, IF the transfer is unsuccessful this round, I have no more frozen embies to get ready. I need to go through the whole process again starting from a Day 2 new cycle and most of all, another sum of money has to be spent again. 

I cried a little. Hubby cuddled me and asked me to think positively. He mentioned that 2 embies are better than none. At least we have 2 embies for this round. Who knows, we will successfully get pregnant. He said, we consider very lucky as only 7 eggs were retrieved and 2 has been frozen now. Some had retrieved 10+ eggs but yet also only 2 were frozen. He told me not to be greedy. We will just hope that these 2 embies will grow in my tummy and be a mummy soon. 

Pray, pray & pray...

I hope things will just goes on smoothly. Let's think positively!

The eggs collection day - 31 May 2017

I am all ready for the eggs collection this morning. I had started to fast since last night from 12am. There was no food and not even a sip of plain water. My procedure is scheduled to be start at 9:30am. Both hubby and I were way much earlier than that arrived at DC Mall. I knew hubby did not had a good sleep last night, he went up and down to the living hall whole night. 

We registered at the reception before 8:30am and were directed straight to the Recovery Area. I was asked to change with the robe, a locker to keep my clothes and settled myself on my Recovery Bed 3. I am the 3rd patients in that morning for the eggs collection. Hubby accompanied me until the nurse told him to get ready for his sperm collection. I was asked to sign a consent form, to check on my blood pressure, heart beat and allergies. 

Hubby came back to the Recovery Room about half an hour later and he joined me back when the anesthesiologist came to put the line for my on my right hand. The red band on my left hand indicated my allergic to Ponstan. 

Dr. Helena dropped by to check and confirm on my last injection. I responded that it was on the 29 May, 9:30pm. I was asked to empty my bladder before the procedure about 15 minutes before that. About 9:25am, nurses came and Dr. Helena was waiting in the OPU. I was being pushed in and I saw Dr. Prashant was around too. They confirmed my name and IC number, asked me to confirm the procedure that I am going to do and started to prepare me for the eggs collection procedure. 

Both my hands were put on my chest, the anesthesiologist had injected few solutions through the line she put in just now. A nurse get the the oxygen mask and asked to breath as usual. I knew from that time, I started to feel dizzy and just black out. 

I heard a voice of a nurse calling my name asked me to wake up. And she told me the procedure was done. The nurse telling me not to worry and will be pushing me back to my Recovery Bed. Then I heard a voice; hubby told me not to worry, asked me to sleep and everything will be okay. I felt a little discomfort, but couldn't describe what was it. I knew I was tearing non stop. Hubby wiped my tear and nurses thought that I was wanted to vomit.

Few of them came and checked on me if I was okay, blood pressure was check every 10 minutes. I do not know why, was it too emotional or was it painful, I just couldn't stop my tears. 

I opened my eyes, lights still seems dancing, couldn't catch hubby at the right position, I closed my eyes again. I am conscious but the anesthetic still made me blur. I asked hubby the time, he told me I was being pushed out at 10am but I glimpsed on his watch was 10:30am. He told me I was still sleeping when I was being pushed put, but I told him I was awake. I was not sure about the missing half an hour; and I have been asking and asking for few times. 

At about 11am, the nurse came and checked if I am okay. She asked if she can make me a cup of Milo by then. Hubby got me a cup of warm water and the nurse made me a cup of hot Milo with some biscuits. When I seems calmed down and stable, she asked me to change and will inform Dr. Helena to drop by. Dr. Helena informed that 7 eggs were collected and we will get informed about the fertilized eggs by Saturday (Day 3) or Tuesday (Day 6). Embryologist will inform us on how many successful embryos had survived. She asked me to come back for my next appointment to check on my polyps after my next cycle of period. An embryologist came as well, explained on the procedures they do and the charges of frozen embryos. 

Then we were ready to go home. I was given 2 tables of Celebrax of 400mg as pain killer. The nurse informed that I may feel the pain by evening and if I couldn't stand the pain take the Celebrax when necessary. Celebrax 400mg is high in dosage as I am allergic to Ponstan which is only 250mg. I was asked not to drive and straight head home to take enough rest. Dizziness still there especially in the car on the way home. I took a warm shower after lunch and head to bed for a nap. I felt bloated at my abdomen area and my breast were sore. 

Woke up at about 7pm and we were ready for dinner. That time, the pain kicked in badly. I felt I couldn't stand up straight, I don't know where was the pain, I felt my whole body was so tight that I felt totally uncomfortable. There was no right positions that I can feel comfortable. My back was pain, my stomach was pain, I feel pain even my ribs. I curled myself on the bed; I knew hubby was worried looking at my condition. He asked if I wanted to take the painkiller or he made me a warmer bag. I don't know where exactly the pain came from, I just want to have a right position to make me feel more comfortable. I dozed off when I got the right position and I survived without the painkiller.

I got up at about 7am this morning, feels better; at least I could stands up straight. 

Am ready for eggs collection

As scheduled, we were going back for the 3rd appointment on Monday morning. After the scan, I have 4 big follicles in my right ovary (18-20mm) and 3 on my left (13-18mm). Dr Helena mentioned that with this growth, am ready for eggs collection on Wednesday, 31/5/17. She hoped that she could be able to retrieve as many as she could as there are still some small follicles that wouldn't want to grow.

The follicles chart

Today, am given the last trigger shot - Ovidrel. This has to be taken at 9:30pm sharp tonight. Also, I have to take Augmentin antibiotics starting tomorrow, 2 tablets a day for day and night up to 5 days. The nurse informed that I need to be at the center at 8:30am on Wednesday morning for the procedure preparation and I will be put on sleep at 9:30am. Hubby would to be produce with sperm on the same morning as well. Also, I am to confirm that I am allergic to Ponstan and this has to be reminded to the anesthesiologist again on the procedure day.   

Ovidrel - the trigger shot to be taken 36 hours prior the procedure

Augmentin 625mg - an antibiotic to prevent infection

Some mixed feelings I had in me. Started to feel worry with the quality of the eggs. Started to feel sorry if things doesn't turns out good. 

Positive vibes, positive vibes... I needed so much. 

The 2nd appointment of IVF cycle

Last Friday, was the 2nd appointment of the IVF cycle which scheduled at the noon time. Hubby accompanied me to the Center as we will both later proceed for the acupuncture session after the appointment. As usual, the waiting time at the KLF is long, my appointment was at 2:30pm and was only called in to see Dr. Helena at about 3:40pm. This appointment was just a normal scan to check on the growth of follicles.

On my Day 6, I had 4 growing follicles on my right ovary and only 2 on my left. The numbers of the follicles were in borderline; quantity was not that good. However, Dr recommended to continue as the sizes were growing rapidly. Left ones around 12-14mm and right about 10-12mm. All of us hoped, that the quality would be good once retrieved. I am quite saddened deep down with the low quantity. I knew, hubby has the same thoughts as well. Both of us didn't talked much about it, but he kept encouraging me that things gonna be fine.

I started the Orgalutran today. The nurse demonstrated how it is to be done for the first time. This injection was abit painful compared to the previous two. The soreness lasted for about half and hour; come and go. The Orgalutran has to be injected at the same time every morning for 3 days till my next appointment on Monday morning. The Gonal-F has finished but to continue with Menupor at the same time every night with 150iu.

Injections to carry on:
- Orgalutran 0.25mg every morning
- Menupor 150iu every night

Orgalutran 0.25mg

As per Dr. Helena, since the follicles sizes are growing quite fast, the eggs collection may be done on Wednesday on my Day 11. After all things settled, another RM6,000 payment made today.

All I hope is to be able to have some good quality of follicles to be fertilized. Am worry with the low amount; I do not able to have some good numbers of embryo to be freezed.

2nd FSH injections at home

Hubby helped with the injections at home last night. The nurse mentioned that we must to take the injections at the same time every night before 10pm. The Gonal-F was fine but the Menopur was a bit painful for me. 

Some side effects of the FSH injections are like nausea, headache, bloated, sore throat, abdominal pain and mood swings. The nurse explained that all these are normal if I ever feel that. As I had went through 2 IUIs before, I understand and I am prepared this round. Previously during my IUIs, my stomach bloated, I had headache and my mood was terribly interrupted. I was so emotional; I got heat up so easily and I cried so hard both the cycles. 

For this time round, I told myself that I am ready for it. The first injections I had at the Centre on Monday, I felt a little nausea while am on the way back home. The nauseousness went off after I had a warm shower once I reached home. 

Last night, after the 2nd injections I felt back pain the entire night till I couldn't sleep well. I got up every hour until I felt hungry at about 4am. I made a cup of hot milo and went back to bed at about 430am. I am lucky that I am not working anymore now. I could have more sleeps in the day time. 

Oh ya, some daily medications schedule nowadays: 

- after breakfast: Xi Fertility Chinese herbs

- after lunch: Fish Oil, Folic Acid, Protexin Probitics

- after dinner: Xi Fertility Chinese herbs

- before bed: FSH injections

I do take some nuts and seeds daily. It says it helps in the IVF diet; I have:

- 3/4pcs of Brazil nuts daily

- a grasp of sunflower seed

- some dried raisins and cranberries

Am not really sure how much it does helps with all these. Since there's no harm, so I'll just try.  

The IVF

I had some spotting on the Saturday morning and that I knew my period is coming soon. As per the explanation by the nurse in KL Fertility, I need to go back on my Day 2 or Day 3 period for a scan in order to confirm if I can start my IVF cycle. Since the spotting is on Saturday, I quickly made an appointment for Monday morning. The normal bleeding was only came on the evening on Saturday and that made my Day 1 is on Sunday. 

Hubby and I arrived at the KLF as early as 8:30 am  on that Monday morning. The reception that picked up my call informed that I need to do some blood test in the morning before seeing Dr. Helena. When we reached there, it seems like there were some system error with their newly installed queuing system, my name was not recorded for that day appointment but was remarked that I am coming to start my cycle. The receptionist put my in queue straightaway and my number was called to Dr. Helena's room short after that. 

Dr. Helena always gives me a positive impression that she always carries a big smile on her face. She greeted us and took out the insulin report and semen analysis we did the other day. Mine was fine but hubby's analysis was not that good this time round. I was surprised as this while hubby's report were fine. But she mentioned that it's fine, we may consider for ICSI for a higher chance of successful rate. 

I went on the bed and she scan on me. I have 7 follicles on my left ovary and 6 on my right. She said it was a good number to start of but the follicles are not that robust to be seen. But she assured me that if the blood test result shows fine, than we are good to start the IVF this cycle.

Came out from her room, my number was called again for the blood test and we were told that the result will be ready by 1pm. We were asked to come back by then. Since it was only 10+am, we when out from DC Mall and went to Mid Valley for window shopping. We went back at about 12:30pm and waited till 3pm. I am sure the queuing system went haywire again as those who came later that me has been called and left. I went to the registration counter to check on my turn and they informed I am already in the queue. Finally my number was called at about 3pm. The nurse informed that we are able to start the IVF treatment this cycle. She explained on the injections that needed to be done and the dosage to be taken. All medications and injections to be given to me in a cooler bag. 

I have the followings for 4 days: 
Day 2: 150iu of Menopur + 300iu of Gonal-F
Day 3: 150iu of Menopur + 300iu of Gonal-F
Day 4: 150iu of Menopur + 150iu of Gonal-F
Day 5: 150iu of Menopur + 150iu of Gonal-F

Menopur injection in syringe with solution in a small bottle

Gonal-F injection in a pen

Consent forms and injection schedule

The nurse demonstrated the first injections and we were to do it ourselves at home after that. She informed that the time of injections has to be the same daily and to mark down it on the schedule given.  

The package cost RM17,650 for only the IVF alone. 

- 1st payment of RM6,000 + RM100 (refundable deposit for cooler bag) made today

- 2nd payment of RM6,000 on the next visit

- balance will be made before the eggs collection day

There will be an additional of RM1,600 for ICSI and RM600 for thawing fees as we are going for the frozen embryos transfer (FET). 

After all these things settled at KLF, we went to Xi Fertility at the other side for acupuncture. This time round, hubby followed as to hope it would increases the performance of his little brother. It was a tiring day for both of us that day. We went out from home at 7 in the morning and reached home at the same time, 7 in the evening. 

I'm back in another stage of life

Never realized that this blog has been abandoned for such a long time. Re-read all the posts that has been wrote and I feel like it was like yesterday that all had happened. 

Almost 6 years past, am now venturing towards another stage of life. All the previous hatred has changed. We are now in a happier path and time is all needed throughout the journey of acceptance and heal.

Leaving the past stories aside, let's talk about now...

I have had left my job of a decade built. It has been almost 3 months now that I am staying at home since my last day at work on 7th March 2017. The decision of leaving was hard and it has took me really a lot of courage to do so. There were many reasons of quitting; stress at work, nonrecognition from the management, office politics and most of all, our family planning. 

Hubby and I has been trying for quite sometime, but luck and baby dust are always not on our side. Hence, we hope with the decision of quitting my job would gives us a better chance with less stress and less worry. 

Some stages of our trying to conceive: 
May 2010: got married

mid 2013: started to plan for baby, had some preliminary check with gynecologist at Columbia Asia Cheras. Doctor advised to try naturally for sometime first. 

2013-2014: been trying to conceive naturally

Mar 2015: seek for TCM assistance for about 4 months (with Chinese herbs medication)

Jun 2015: started first IUI at Prince Court under Dr. Paul Tay supervision; failed

Aug 2015: second IUI at Prince Court; failed as well

Sep 2015: infected with vaginal infection; Candida Albicans; treated with some antibiotics medication and vagina pessary from Prince Court

end Sep 2015: infection continues; seek for 2nd opinion from KL Fertility under Dr. Helena Lim; treated with Pro-biotics medications

early Nov 2015: follow-up consultation at KL Fertility; found a 14mm polyps in my uterus

Dec 2015: Polyps removal at Pantai Hospital KL under Dr. Helena's care

2016: vaginal infection keeps on disturbing now and then. Hubby and I have no choice but to put on hold the TTC plan until I feel comfortable to continue.

Jan 2017: Hubby and I decided to continue our journey with IVF at KL Fertility. 

mid Mar 2017: started my first acupuncture treatment (in weekly basis) at Xi Fertility together with Chinese herbs medication daily; under Dr. Yuan Ting supervision. She advised that she required few cycles to monitor my situation in order to start my IVF treatment. 

Apr 2017: appointment with Dr. Helena again to initiate the IVF plan and scan; found another polyps growth that needed to be removed 

My heart went down totally when I got to know there's another polyps growth in me. I felt lost and worried. All in my plan now is to get an IVF treatment but yet there's another polyps that needed to be removed. From Dr. Helena's explanation, I have no choice but to go for the frozen embryos transfer.

I have just started my IVF treatment yesterday with the first injections. Will explain more in my next post. 

Positive vibes I needed so much!